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Tuesday 23 April 2013

Your pencil case - 10 items you couldn't live without


At school a girl had many potential status symbols, but perhaps chief among these was her pencil case and its contents. Your pencil case was constantly on display for all to see, and as such had to have a certain amount of thought put into it.

I'll take you through the contents of my pencil case, explaining why each item was a must have.

The pencil case -


Either a cloth pencil case or a pencil tin were acceptable. I had an ace Jelly Babies pencil tin; sadly I can't even find a picture of one these days. If anyone has one, please send me your address so I can come round and steal it.

A pencil tin should be hinged rather than have a separate lid, as the lid will invariably go missing, or get stolen by Ben Richardson. Cloth pencil cases should be made of fabric that's easy to write on; not only can you the 'mark your territory', as it were, but, like a plaster cast, others' contributions will show off your popularity. Unless they write “Jenny is fat and smells of wee.”

you could write on a pencil tin too, but the writing had to be etched in with a compass – not the easiest or safest move for clumsy hands to master.

Pencil -


Only two kinds of standard pencil were acceptable – either the yellow and black striped model issued by most schools, or a pencil with cartoon characters/ponies/lovehearts on. No extra points for glitter, because the glitter will stay on the pencil for approximately two minutes after purchase.

Ultimate status symbol – the retractable pencil


Although always snapping, therefore not much good for actual writing, the engineering genius behind these made them jaw-droppingly impressive.

Felt tips -


As many different colours as possible, including some as yet undiscovered by science. The ultimate felt tips to own were made by Molin. The old models looked different from the above picture, having white lids with rounded ends. Usually came in packs of about five thousand, in every possible shade contained in the visual spectrum. Care then had to be taken over which colours would win a place in your pencil case, since you could only realistically carry about ten at a time. This didn't matter too much, as it was generally recognised that if you had some Molin pens, you had thousands more at home.

Honourable mentions – Crayola felt tips, Berol felt tips

Pencil sharpener -


This was the standard model; sometimes you'd have a double-holed sharpener, although there was really no point to this. However, you were down for some serious respect if you owned one of these, complete with pull out tray for your sharpenings -


I'm not sure what the rules were for owning both a handled sharpener and a retractable pencil. I think the sharpener trumped the pencil, but I could be wrong.

Eraser -


not just one eraser, but many, many erasers. Ideally stored in a shoebox at home, your eraser collection was another thing capable of awarding instant cool points. In your collection, you must have -

one shaped like a hot dog

one with a magic, ink erasing side (that never worked)

ones that smelled of fruit

rectangular ones with cartoon characters stamped on them

all others were optional, but certainly never did any harm. Of course, you couldn't bring your entire collection to school in one go, so the trick was to bring a few ones every day, displaying them nonchalantly.

Ruler -


There were two rulers to, erm, rule them all, if you'll pardon the pun. These were the water ruler, and the 'shatterproof' ruler (bonus points for coloured plastic rather than clear).

Honourable mention – rulers with letter stencils cut into them (ultimately useless as you were supposed to be practising your joined-up writing).

Fountain pen -


The ULTIMATE status symbol – you were nothing without one of these. Not only did it mark you out as grown up enough to be trusted with an ink pen, but the cartridges proved to be invaluable trade fodder (see #7).

Ink colour didn't matter so much, although blue was sometimes favoured over black. Designs varied, but patterned was usually preferred to plain. If you must have a plain pen, make it a good colour such as pink or mint green.

Ink cartridges -

This is where the pencil tin comes into its own, because it allows you to have your cartridges stored neatly in a row at one end, whereas with a pencil case they have no choice but to move around, getting lost.

Ink cartridges were a kind of currency, being traded for such delights as erasers, friendship bracelets, and different colour ink cartridges. Other uses of ink cartridges included throwing them at people, and cutting/biting the tops off to see what was inside (usually ink).

Pencil sharpenings/wax crayon sharpenings -


At the bottom of every pencil case - no exceptions. The difference between the two is that pencil sharpenings were rubbish and got there by accident, whereas wax crayon sharpenings were made on purpose. When the girls on your table got bored of doing work, you would get out your pencil sharpeners and continue with your “glitter making” project – collecting fucking tons of crayon shavings in every conceivable colour, then mixing them together to make some kind of really crappy “glitter”. We never did anything with this “glitter”, and it usually just got swept away by an annoyed teacher/caretaker.

Notes -


Before every child had an iphone with MSN and Facebook as standard, these were the primary method of communication regarding confidential matters. These notes concerned things like “Do you love Joe L? YES/NO”, “Angela smells, pass it on”, and “Everyone throw stuff at Angela when I say go”. Although this last move was risky, as quite often you just got all your stuff confiscated.

Optional extras -

stickers

tiny key rings shaped like teddy bears

friendship bracelets

a pot of Boots 'Natural Collection' lip balm, which you've had for years, and which gives everyone coldsores.

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